Added: Aya Neer - Date: 11.08.2021 16:13 - Views: 25565 - Clicks: 9871
A widower who feels so alone has considered taking his own life. Mariella Frostrup replies that it is shameful that the rest of us have allowed this to happen — and also suggests ways to tentatively re-engage with the world.
The dilemma I am an year-old widower whose wife died three years ago after 30 wonderful years together. My family are very supportive, and I have very good friends and neighbours, which helps me manage myself and my home independently. I am still able to drive, which is essential in this rural community.
I am very busy in the local community, and I keep myself active.
I do, however, return to a lonely house. I have considered suicide, but have decided that this would be a lot of hassle for my family, who all live some distance away. How shameful for the rest of us that you should be feeling this way. In the UK, the of elderly who are so lonely they contemplate suicide, despite having no serious illness or disability to contend with, is a national disgrace. You clearly recognise the damage taking your own life would wreak among those who care about you.
You are clearly a spirited octogenarian, perfectly capable of caring for yourself and still active within your community. One of the misnomers about ageing is that you grow into your years. Have you thought about taking in a lodger, maybe a young person in need Mature and lonely a roof over their head? In our overcrowded land, house sharing should be appropriate at any age, not just reserved for youth. I recently had a best friend come back from many years abroad and share my flat for a few months. It was a revelation in terms of the easy companionship it offered but this Friends scenario was greeted with incredulity and raised eyebrows by our contemporaries.
There is nothing shameful in feeling lonely, the shame is on us for being so blind to the lives of others. Your letter should be the first step in a process of pushing yourself back into life. There is a populous world out there of people your age and younger, with similar interests.
Your family need to know you are lonely, as do your friends. More often than not when we extend a hand, someone will grasp it, but we first need to take the leap of faith and reach out.
A first step if you have a spare room is to rent it out to an acceptable individual and see how this shapes up. You could be handing someone a lifeline. Please write and let me know how you get on. If you are affected by these issues, call the Samaritans on or visit mind. If you have a dilemma, send a brief to mariella. Follow her on Twitter mariellaf1. Dear Mariella Life and style.
I am old and lonely. I feel so sad returning to my empty home. Photograph: Alamy. Mariella Frostrup. Sun 7 Oct Topics Life and style Dear Mariella Loneliness features. Reuse this content.Mature and lonely
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Sad and lonely mature woman 60 years old sitting on couch at home